I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
my sisters under your porch take her home
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
