apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
