Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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