Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
