So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize