just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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