So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
