if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
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