Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
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