I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?