Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Randomize
