How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
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