Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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