according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Randomize
