can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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