Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?