i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Randomize
