some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Randomize
