I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
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