My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
