A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
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