I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
