How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
of course. lets lasso hookers.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
