And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Randomize
