Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Randomize
