tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
