nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Even the bartender felt bad for me
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Randomize
