Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
I've blown a few things in my day
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Randomize