I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Randomize
