Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
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