I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
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