sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize