I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
I just saw a hot homeless man
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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