All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
