Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Randomize