3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
It was like getting head from an anaconda
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
i now understand why vodka
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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