Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
Randomize