I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
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He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
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I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
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