Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
