i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
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