Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
