i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Randomize
