I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
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