Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
