The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize