im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
