Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
