Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
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