everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Randomize
