mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize